Gratitude, Day 14 and 15: The Struggle Is Real

NOTE: I am a fan of 30-day challenges, and November is traditionally a time of two: National Novel Writing Month, and 30 Days of Thanks. As I am not a fiction writer, this year I have chosen to publish a daily blog for the entire month, expressing my gratitude. This may not be entirely food-focused, but expect recipes aplenty. Feel free to join me in the comments below. What are you thankful for today?

The three of you that are following along on my 30 Days of Thanks may have noticed that I missed yesterday.

The struggle is real.

Not the struggle to write. I have a lot to say but can be very lazy and don’t physically write it down sometimes, but in general, #KnockWood, I can usually gather a few thoughts together and write when the rubber meets the road.

Not even really the struggle to be grateful. There are so many things that I am thankful for that I could start a list and add something to it every ten minutes until the end of November and still probably not be finished. Every day I am amazed and grateful for the people, animals, and other general things that happen. Even on the shittiest days.

My struggle these days is to remain hopeful.

Every morning I wake up, let the dogs out, make some coffee, let the dogs in, let the cat out, feed the dogs, drink my coffee, and check email, Facebook, etc.

The second I open up my electronics, my day goes south.

There is nothing hopeful about what is occurring right now. Everything my liberal friends are trying to do and say about what has transpired over the past week is completely overshadowed by the continued asshattery of cabinet appointments and other general bullshit coming from the president-elect.

This is not meant to be a political post, but I am not really sorry if you are offended. I am offended by the result of the race, but I won’t get into that here.

The writing is on the wall: the climate, minorities, women, LGBT community, and the rural poor and working classes (although they don’t know it yet) are all screwed, for years and years to come.

And it’s super easy to talk about coming together when you have control of all three branches of government.

So hope is not a thing with feathers, perching in my soul, and that feeling makes me wonder why even bother?

And yet. I have committed. I have said I would.

I tell my kid that when you have nothing else, you have your word. You can do what you say you will do. You can keep your promises.

This matters. This one little thing.

So for yesterday, I was thankful to receive a letter from my kid in France, along with a slew of pictures. She has a dog here in Baltimore (Winston, who misses her desperately), and she is currently cheating on him with this dog, Joy.

Note the tongue.
Note the tongue.

It was nice to get real mail (even though it was TOO SHORT), and I am going to write her an actual letter and send it along this afternoon.

Side note: If you came to her going away party and took an envelope, write that kid a letter. #PleaseAndThankYou

Today, I am thankful for coffee, a back that isn’t hurting at the moment, positive notes about the food I am making and delivering for people, and the fact that even though this morning is still young there might be other things to be grateful for later on.

If you know someone feeling a little hopeless today, take a moment and do something nice for them. Even if you don’t know someone who is feeling hopeless or overwhelmed, do something nice anyway. Pay for the coffee of the person behind you. Say something nice to a stranger. Hold the door and let someone go first. It’s not hard and requires very little psychic energy, but can you imagine what might happen if even half of the people in your life took on this challenge and just did one easy, nice thing?

That would be a real disruption to the status quo.

What are you grateful for today?

Gratitude, Day 13: Hastily Assembled Edition

NOTE: I am a fan of 30-day challenges, and November is traditionally a time of two: National Novel Writing Month, and 30 Days of Thanks. As I am not a fiction writer, this year I have chosen to publish a daily blog for the entire month, expressing my gratitude. This may not be entirely food-focused, but expect recipes aplenty. Feel free to join me in the comments below. What are you thankful for today?

Between cooking for deliveries this evening, a yoga workshop this afternoon, delivering what I cooked, and a last-minute (delicious) invitation to venison pot-pie, there has not been much time for reflection.

So that’s what I am thankful for today – this hastily assembled blog post is brought to you by good food, good friends, and good yoga, all of which are what makes my world go ’round.

See you tomorrow.

Gratitude, Day 12: Coconut Cake

NOTE: I am a fan of 30-day challenges, and November is traditionally a time of two: National Novel Writing Month, and 30 Days of Thanks. As I am not a fiction writer, this year I have chosen to publish a daily blog for the entire month, expressing my gratitude. This may not be entirely food-focused, but expect recipes aplenty. Feel free to join me in the comments below. What are you thankful for today?

I have been craving cake for two weeks.

If I was not gluten-free, this would be easy enough.

Gluten-filled cake is like pizza or sex: even when it’s not the best, it’s still pretty good. A cake craving can be easily handled with a quick Suzy-Q from the 7-11 or something from the bakery at Giant. They even hand that shit out for free sometimes, so I could have technically just gotten a couple of samples and have been done with it.

Gluten-free cake, on the other hand, can be a total waste of money and the time it takes to go buy it. Some are gritty, some taste heavily of the bean flours with which they are made, and some forgo things like sugar and butter and try to be healthy.

I am too lazy to go try to acquire a cake that tastes terrible, and I just didn’t feel like baking a cake that feeds 14 for just little old me.

Today, I am grateful that I made a cake.

This cake.

Imma eat the shit out of this cake.
Imma eat the shit out of this cake.

It’s a little bulgy in the middle (like I will be after eating it ALL GONE) because the frosting is a marshmallow creation that isn’t always up to, well, holding up a cake.

No matter. It does the job as long as it needs to, which isn’t very long because I may be sending this out to those lucky folks who ordered food this week. #Surprise

I used the white cake recipe from the piecaken experiment last year, subbing coconut milk for regular milk, and I covered the whole damn thing with coconut.

It’s delicious.

What are you grateful for?

Gratitude, Day 11: Poetry

NOTE: I am a fan of 30-day challenges, and November is traditionally a time of two: National Novel Writing Month, and 30 Days of Thanks. As I am not a fiction writer, this year I have chosen to publish a daily blog for the entire month, expressing my gratitude. This may not be entirely food-focused, but expect recipes aplenty. Feel free to join me in the comments below. What are you thankful for today?

This is not the November I expected it to be.

Yesterday I had a conversation with Sicily in France about the current election situation. We talked about the writing on the wall and how hard it was for the French to understand why she didn’t really want to get out of bed on November 9th. Today I also read, against my better judgment, a slew of racist and abusive texts as well as testimonials about people of color and Muslims being attacked and told to leave (or in the case of one Muslim woman’s encounter, hang herself with her own hijab).

It seems grim days are ahead.

But as ever, there are things to be thankful for.

Today, I am thankful for poetry.

I keep hearing Wendell Berry in my head today:

“When despair for the world grows in me
and I wake in the night at the least sound
in fear of what my life and my children’s lives may be,
I go and lie down where the wood drake
rests in his beauty on the water, and the great heron feeds.
I come into the peace of wild things
who do not tax their lives with forethought
of grief. I come into the presence of still water.
And I feel above me the day-blind stars
waiting with their light. For a time
I rest in the grace of the world, and am free.”

I am so thankful today for the music in words.

I am grateful for the beauty that poets see, as well as the despair they so eloquently express.

Feelings like pictures on the page, leaping in swirls whether written or typed.

In poems we can come into the peace of wild things even in the midst of the deepest anguish and anxiety and fear. We need not be in the middle of the woods to rest in the grace of the world but can instead rest in the grace of the words of men and women who have written before us.

This day I think of the simple promise of the sun rising just as it has for as long as we know, and I leave you with Mary Oliver’s “Morning Poem.”

Morning Poem
Every morning
the world
is created.
Under the orange

sticks of the sun
the heaped
ashes of the night
turn into leaves again

and fasten themselves to the high branches —
and the ponds appear
like black cloth
on which are painted islands

of summer lilies.
If it is your nature
to be happy
you will swim away along the soft trails

for hours, your imagination
alighting everywhere.
And if your spirit
carries within it

the thorn
that is heavier than lead —
if it’s all you can do
to keep on trudging —

there is still
somewhere deep within you
a beast shouting that the earth
is exactly what it wanted —

each pond with its blazing lilies
is a prayer heard and answered
lavishly,
every morning,

whether or not
you have ever dared to be happy,
whether or not
you have ever dared to pray.

And finally, it seems appropriate here to quote the genius Leonard Cohen whose death was announced just last night in another heinous crime against humanity:

“Poetry is just the evidence of life. If your life is burning well, poetry is the ash.”

Go easy, Leonard Cohen.

What are you grateful for?

Gratitude, Day 10: Pho Real

NOTE: I am a fan of 30-day challenges, and November is traditionally a time of two: National Novel Writing Month, and 30 Days of Thanks. As I am not a fiction writer, this year I have chosen to publish a daily blog for the entire month, expressing my gratitude. This may not be entirely food-focused, but expect recipes aplenty. Feel free to join me in the comments below. What are you thankful for today?

Day one in a new America, but day ten in the (now very challenging) gratitude challenge.

Yesterday was a roller coaster of emotion for me. I spent most of the morning in bed, crying when I thought about how I was supposed to teach yoga to children later that day.

I watched HRC’s concession speech and saw a more presidential non-president elect than I think I have ever seen. I half expected her to say, “You know what? Fuck you. I have given my entire life in service to this country, and you went with someone who has given his entire life in service to gaining wealth for himself.”

But she did not. As always, she was graceful, intelligent, and passionate.

So here we are, day ten of gratitude, and today, I am grateful for soup.

Soul medicine.
Soul medicine.

Not just any soup.

Soul-warming noodle soup from Mi & Yu Noodle Bar in Federal Hill (also now in Mt. Vernon but parking sucks there).

After teaching yoga I stopped off and picked up some soup on the way home – kimchi broth with tofu and pho for me, and vegetarian broth with tofu and ramen for Khristian.

I drove home in the dark and the rain and found Khristian in the kitchen, sipping bourbon and reading.

I took off my jacket and boots while Khristian unpacked our goodies. We sat down together in the dim light of the kitchen and consoled ourselves with spicy, aromatic, and deeply nourishing bowls of soup.

Exactly what was needed.

I have a recipe for pho, an amazing recipe that is full-on plagiarized from somewhere.

I repeat: this is not my recipe.

I repeat that because I recently saw someone try to pass this recipe off as their own on The Kitchn, word for word. Plagiarizing recipes is a big fat no-no, and I called them on it.

The problem here is that all I have of this recipe is a stained piece of paper with the ingredients and the method – no attribution. So I point out it’s not mine but cannot give full credit, which is distressing but sometimes that’s the way things happen. You cut out a recipe or jot down ingredients, not realizing that it will be life-changing and you’ll want to share it later.

If you are not lucky enough to live near Mi & Yu or some similar place, make this when you need comfort. The broth freezes beautifully, so you can even make it on a bright, sunny day and just save it for when the clouds roll in.

Pho

Born in Vietnam in the 1880s, pho is little more than beef broth with thinly sliced vegetables and meat cooked directly in the piping hot broth, served with fresh herbs and lime. I have very little experience with cooking Asian food in general and with pho specifically. I am sure there are a million variations on this very delicious theme.

But I don’t profess to be a connoisseur. I have not made a career of seeking out the best pho, and I have never been to Vietnam. I don’t trust street food, where, it’s rumored, some of the best bowls are to be found, and I didn’t even know how to properly pronounce the word until my friend Kerry’s husband Mark looked at me askance and said with a bit of an air, “You mean, FUH?”

But I will say that this is the best pho-king pho I have ever had. It takes work. Multiple days. It costs a lot of money, way more than a bowl of something just as good at a pho shop would taste. But at the end of it all, you get to sit down with a bunch of friends around bowls filled with fresh, brightly colored vegetables and meat and share something utterly delicious and satisfying.

Broth Ingredients

Note: Make this the day ahead. When ready to serve, heat to nearly boiling and refresh with sliced fresh ginger. This broth can also be frozen.

5 pounds beef bones with marrow (oxtails can also be used)
2 pounds beef chuck, or other similar, flavorful cut of stewing or roasting beef
2-3” pieces of ginger, bruised with a knife and charred (see technique below)
2 medium yellow onions, peeled and charred (see technique below)
¼ cup fish sauce (don’t skimp)
3 tablespoons light brown sugar
Toasted spices: 10 whole star anise, 6 whole cloves
1 tablespoon salt (not iodized; sea salt, preferably)

Broth Method

Charring technique: Bruising the ginger by pounding it with the flat of a chef’s knife before charring helps release more juice and flavor. For both ginger and onion, use tongs and hold over a flame until the sides are burnt and smoking. Both ginger and onions will become fragrant in about three or four minutes. Peel skin and discard before using.

For the spices: toast star anise and cloves in a dry sauté pan over medium heat until fragrant. Cool slightly and wrap in cheesecloth. Set aside.

For those with electric or convection cooktops, ginger and onions can be placed directly on the burner for the same effect. A crème bruleé torch can also be used.

Assemble two stockpots, one large and one medium. In the large stockpot, bring six quarts of water to a boil.

Place the beef bones and chuck in the medium stockpot and cover with water. Bring to a rolling boil and boil for five minutes. This first step removes impurities from the beef and helps you create a clear broth.

Remove the bones and beef with tongs and place in the large stockpot, discarding water from medium stockpot.

When the water returns to a boil, simmer for about 20 minutes, skimming fat and foam that rises to the top. Add charred ginger, charred onion, fish sauce, and sugar, then simmer for about 40 minutes until beef is tender (continue to skim the surface periodically). Remove beef, cutting it in half. Place half back in the pot, and the other half in a bowl of cold water for ten minutes. After ten minutes, remove from water and cut into thin slices (set aside for serving).

After about 90 minutes of simmering, add spice bag and allow to simmer and infuse the broth for about 30 minutes. Remove spice bag and onions, discarding both, then continue to simmer, skimming constantly. Add salt and cook for a total of at least two hours (the longer the better).

Remove bones and beef and discard. Strain broth through cheesecloth. At this point, the broth can be cooled and kept for later serving. It can also be frozen.

Garnishes

One package rice sticks, prepared according to package directions
Raw beef sirloin, frozen and then thinly sliced across the grain
Yellow onion, thinly sliced
Scallions, green part only, sliced into rings
Bean sprouts
Lime wedges
Asian basil (or regular basil if Asian basil is not available)
Chopped cilantro

Assembly

Bring broth back to a rolling boil. If you have cooled it completely or frozen the broth, refresh with two or three pieces of fresh ginger.

Warm soup bowls with boiling water.

Assemble all of your garnishes. If you are having friends over, place all garnishes out and allow them to add what they like.

General guidelines for assembly combine cooked beef with raw ingredients that get cooked with the hot broth. Start with prepared noodles in the bottom of the bowl. Add a few pieces of cooked beef chuck and a few slices of raw sirloin. Ladle boiling soup on top of noodles and serve with large bowls of fresh onion, scallions, and herbs. Make slurping sounds and be prepared for not much talking.

What are you grateful for?